


✂

by orphan_account



Series: All Written by Same Author [35]
Category: Naruto
Genre: (i kinda like it), Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Angst, Crack Treated Seriously, Don't Repost Onto Another Site, Family Member Death, Fix-It of Sorts, Gen, Ghosts, Hair, Haircuts, Humor, I think theres like one two sentences of body horror regarding eyeballs, Lol enjoy, Not Really Character Death, Oh and did i mention Hair, Poltergeists, RIP Izuna, Scheming, Team 7 is a little more functional? i think??, Timeline What Timeline, Uchiha Izuna Needs so many hAIR, Uchiha Massacre, Uchiha Sasuke Needs a Hug, Vague Repressed Memories, because like... Uchiha, bro poor sasuke, don't copy onto another site, honestly a couple of the hair remarks are truuue, i jump around a bit... be warned, izuna and sasuke deserve each other the little snots, izuna just loves his brother okay?, lol, moar haaiiirr, morbid jokes, oooorsss, oops and, scisso, so many Hair, this was pretty random
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-22
Updated: 2020-09-22
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:33:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26523760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Izuna even tried haunting Sasuke's house a few times, but only the neighbor cats ever saw or heard him.So Izuna has reasonably decided that being a ghostsucks. He can't even see other dead people! He can't give off bad vibes, can't possess people... the list goes on. He's starting to think that he's just bad at being dead, which oddly stings his ego. It's not like he was all that good at being alive either, something his current state readily supports.Whatever. He's better at other things. Like hair!Written for Izuna Appreciation Week, Day Three:Time Traveland/orReincarnation.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura & Uchiha Izuna, Hatake Kakashi & Uchiha Izuna, Uchiha Izuna & Uchiha Madara, Uchiha Izuna & Uchiha Sasuke, Uchiha Izuna & Uzumaki Naruto
Series: All Written by Same Author [35]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2032297
Comments: 24
Kudos: 95
Collections: Izuna Appreciation Week





	✂

**Author's Note:**

> ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

"If you're going to insist on having me buried with your eyes, you should at least let me see you smile with them, Nii-san."

Madara sniffles and wipes his eyes, Izuna's eyes, all messy like a child. Izuna really hates it when Madara cries. He can't even find the words to explain why, it's just... disallowable. 

"Hey, hey... Whatever future you choose, I want to see it, okay? Just be careful—look out for yourself. Or," Izuna chuckles, which is actually quite painful, thanks, "I suppose _I'll_ be looking out for you."

"I hope your sense of humor isn't part of the deal." Madara huffs wetly. "Dressing yourself in your funeral garbs... you're so morbid."

Izuna grins. He's mostly trying to convince himself that he's at ease, but having Madara as an excuse is helpful. 

"Sure am!" He chirps. "I think I look good like this, don't I?" Izuna fans out his right arm to show off the ghostly sleeve. 

_Almost..._

Madara pokes Izuna's cheek with his thumb, digging in slightly.

"Oh, shut up, you. Yes, you look lovely—but wait until you–" Madara stumbles, trying to make light of the situation, "–wait until you _rot_ in it. What about your precious hair, then, huh?"

Izuna mock gasps, which makes him cough violently. He's careful to aim toward the floor beside him, opposite to where Madara is kneeling. He won't have his funeral garbs or his brother stained with blood, no ma'am. 

"It'll be the last to rot! Oh, did you ever hear of that myth—how our hair grows out even after death? You should bury me with my shears, you should."

Madara does smile softly at that.

_...time to go._

"I'll tell Hikaku to get them, then." 

Izuna reaches for Madara's face, weakly poking his cheek in his final retaliation. He lightly traces Madara's little smile. 

"Gotcha."

Madara holds Izuna's hand, almost cradling it. A fresh set of tears stream down his face, but Izuna can wipe them away, like this. This... this is good. He just wishes–

Izuna smiles back. "I love you…" 

–he had said it more.

* * *

Madara looks more like him, in this life. Sasuke even has Izuna's unfortunate childhood haircut. Izuna was a cute enough kid—as is Sasuke—to pull it off, but everyone has to grow up. Every time he sees Sasuke, Izuna's hands almost _itch_ to get a hold of his hair. Of course, Sasuke never sees Izuna, with him being dead and all, but that's neither here nor there.

...Okay, it's depressing. Really, his brother is right in front of him all the time, but what's the point of saying _"I love you"_ if he can't hear it? Izuna even tried haunting Sasuke's house a few times, but only the neighbor cats ever saw or heard him. 

So Izuna has reasonably decided that being a ghost _sucks_. He can't even see other dead people! He can't give off bad vibes, can't possess people... the list goes on. He's starting to think that he's just bad at being dead, which oddly stings his ego. It's not like he was all that good at being alive either, something his current state readily supports. 

Whatever. He's better at other things. Like hair! He would've been a very good hair stylist. Anyone would be lucky to have Izuna take care of their hair, really. It's too bad Madara never listened to him. 

Madara...

Right. Not dwelling on that.

* * *

Izuna is following Sasuke's walk back from school as usual when everything goes _wrong_. 

He feels his clan dying. Izuna quickly promises to deal with that emotional mess later, because his dearest sibling is _right in front of him_ and still _alive_. Sasuke _needs_ to be kept away, so Izuna tries to distract him with as many stray cats as he can. This... works, but only for so long.

Eventually, they do return to the Compound, where everyone is dead. Bodies and blood and everything awful and frightening and– and Sasuke opens the living room door. His parents, dead on the floor. 

Oh. Oh, please. Sasuke doesn't need to see his family dead, _not again_. _Madara, Madara–_ please, this doesn't need to happen again. 

Please. 

Sasuke's brother, Itachi, is holding the sword that killed them. Izuna thought he had nothing to worry about with Itachi. He'd... he'd reminded Izuna of his sister, of that pacifism she always clung to, even as a killer. Why...

Why?

Sasuke's crying now. Izuna can't do anything. He can't protect him, can't fight Itachi... He can only watch as Sasuke's put under Tsukuyomi. He's always hated it when Madara cries. Is this his personal hell? Watching his brother cry time and time again, life after life?

...He can't bring himself to look away.

Sasuke confronts Itachi outside, and it's pitiful. It's so awful, but he can't stop watching Sasuke cry.

Itachi spirits away into the night, leaving Sasuke passed out on the ground. Izuna kneels beside him, brushing his hair rhythmically. Of course, his fingers phase through, but sometimes he can almost swear they don't. 

"I love you, I love you..." 

This is all he can do, and it's not enough. 

Sasuke and Izuna are having a really horrid day.

* * *

"Are you me? Am I dreaming?"

Izuna looks around the hospital room. No one. He doesn't sense anyone, either. Well, there are some masked ninja just outside, but Sasuke wouldn't know that. Is he hallucinating? Because there's only... Izuna.

Can he...? After all this time?

"...You talking to me?" 

Sasuke nods. He's looking straight at Izuna. _Oh_. This... oh! This is probably the best thing that's happened since he died, being _seen by his brother_. 

"Um. I really hope you aren't dreaming. I'm in funeral garbs—I'd be worried about... your... psyche. If you were." 

Right. Sasuke's entire family is dead. Izuna's family, too, but Sasuke is from a peaceful era, and he's _seven_. Izuna didn't react well to death when he was seven, either. Being a dead adult gives him a different perspective. 

Izuna also has a strict no-dwelling policy that continues to serve him well. Or at least he _thinks_ it does, which is sort of the point.

Sasuke ignores him, evidently convinced that he's dreaming.

"...I look like Mom. With the long hair."

Okay, time to tell Sasuke that Izuna _isn't_ his subconscious's image of him as an adult.

"Ah. I'm not you. My name is Izuna, and you aren't dreaming. I've been dead for a very long time, and I'm a ghost, best I can tell. There's just no one else for you to focus on anymore, I suppose." Izuna feels himself smile. "I'm the only one you see, out of everyone who's gone..."

Some part of Sasuke, some part of _Madara_ , must recognize Izuna's presence, if he can see him now.

Sasuke nods sleepily.

"Sure..." 

Izuna bites his lip.

"...I'll stay with you. When you go home. I'll follow you anywhere, okay? I'll always be here. Even if I get annoying, you'll always have me."

_I love you..._

Sasuke nods off to sleep.

* * *

Sasuke can see him, the day after. And the day after that. And the day after that.

Izuna likes to think he helps Sasuke's errant loneliness and emptiness. He can even joke with Izuna now, months later. Mostly snotty ones, but Izuna _likes_ snotty jokes. He rewards Sasuke by feeding him blatantly wrong information during history tests, so they're even.

This... is better than he could have hoped for.

* * *

"Oh, honey, _no_."

"What." Sasuke pauses, kunai stopped just short of cutting his hair.

Izuna might actually want to cry. At least it's not a shuriken. Or a sword. Or wire. 

His mother gave him some hair trauma, okay? 

"I used to have the same haircut, _do not_. Please do not just gather it all and cut upwards. _Please_."

Sasuke glares at him.

"What, do you want me to use _scissors_?"

"You have scissors? This whole time? Literally _yes_ , please use those."

Sasuke's glare darkens.

"What's wrong with the way it looks? My mom always cut my hair this way."

Izuna flashes him a pained look. Of course, Sasuke's mom is dead, so disrespecting her hair-care routines... You know what? Izuna's dead, too. He'll disrespect them all he wants. 

Delicately.

"...Your mom had pin-straight hair, didn't she? My mom did, too. She didn't... know what to do with spikes." 

As distinctive as it was, Izuna wouldn't wish Madara's unchecked mane on Sasuke. The horrible split ends, the dryness, the breakage... Oh, Izuna will have to teach Sasuke how to moisturize after battle—Katon really takes it out of the hair. The bangs, especially.

Maybe, if this all goes well, Sasuke won't even have to rely on an undershave—as nice as those can be—like Izuna and his father just to manage all that volume. Well, actually...

"Your hair's sort of flatter than mine." Izuna squints. Okay, that'll probably make coaching Sasuke a little easier.

Sasuke softens his look, but it just turns into a sassy eyeroll, so Izuna is fairly sure he hasn't won him over. To Izuna's horror, he cuts his gathered hair exactly how Izuna told him not to. Sasuke gets a little smirk at Izuna's expression.

Brat. 

"I'll knock the kunai out of your hand, next time. I'll hide them all." Izuna threatens, dead serious.

Sasuke snorts and flicks some of his hair at Izuna, watching it pass through his chest.

"Sure." He says, walking past Izuna and toward the front door, on his merry way to school.

Izuna sneers.

"Poltergeist." He mutters as he grudgingly follows. "Why couldn't I be a poltergeist? Maybe if I try _really hard..._ " 

* * *

The kunai is knocked out of Sasuke's hand. He freezes.

Izuna smiles smugly and crosses his arms. _There_. 

"Let your hair grow out, this time. It's easier to style." 

Sasuke does a half turn, eyes widening at Izuna's more solid state.

"H-how did you–?"

Izuna cocks his hip out and places a hand on his puffed up chest. 

"I tried _really,_ **_really_ ** hard." He states, inordinately proud. Practicing with the stray cats helped a lot.

Sasuke blinks. Tilting his head, he narrows his eyes. Oh, what a schemer he's turned out to be.

"…If I follow your every direction about my hair, will you assist me in fights? _Nobody else knows you're there_." 

Izuna blinks back. A smile breaks out on his face. Him and Madara, dancing alongside each other, even after death...

How could he say no?

"Of course, Sasuke."

* * *

Sasuke has a cue for him to solidify that Izuna tries to follow, unless Sasuke is literally about to die. Which hasn't happened yet, so Izuna remains his trump card. 

Of course, Izuna always warns Sasuke of immediate dangers and gives his strategic input. Except Sasuke largely ignores his strategies because they mostly boil down to mass murder, and Sasuke is surprisingly moral. Whatever. 

Anyways, the cue is a pair of scissors being thrown, which is what Sasuke is doing now, wanting to protect his Uzumaki teammate.

Right, these ice mirrors are going _down_. 

  
  
  


"...So that's why you carry a sword you don't know how to use around." Kakashi says, inspecting the piles of dead bodies on the bridge.

Izuna is mostly solid right now, though he can feel that he's going to go back to only being seen by Sasuke soon. He's got his hand on Sasuke's shoulder, a polite smile on his face.

"We're starting him on basic forms right now, actually. But, yes, I'm why he carries one round. I'm Izuna, Sasuke's personal Uchiha poltergeist. Nice to meet you."

Kakashi stares back tiredly. He sighs, deciding it's better to simply accept facts.

"...Yeah, great to have you. Sakura, Naruto, don't be rude. Say hello to the nice murder-ghost."

Naruto screams.

* * *

"Sasuke, listen to me. You need to retreat. This woman... she's too powerful. You need to get everyone to safety."

Izuna could probably take her, going off her chakra and stance. He's more powerful. But that was when he was alive and didn't have a limited time period to solidify. She seems tricky like Tobirama, so killing her could take _forever_.

Sasuke trembles. He slowly drops a pair of scissors along with his sword on the tree branch, putting his hands up in surrender.

"Use them when you need to." Sasuke whispers, careful not to move his mouth much.

The woman licks her lips, her tongue grotesquely long.

"Oh? Where's that Uchiha fighting spirit in you?" 

"D-do you want our scroll? Here—take it!" Sasuke throws it over.

Naruto accuses him of being an imposter, but Sakura's always been good at telling when Sasuke's interacting with Izuna. She immediately yells at Naruto to not interfere, giving him the peace sign. Their scissors sign, actually. Naruto grudgingly nods, fearfully respectful of anything Izuna-related. He's terrified of ghosts.

This woman is just toying with Team 7. Izuna's seen his share of bloodline thiefs—is she after the Sharingan? Izuna remembers one of his brothers' corpses, how he burned off his eyes to avoid capture. That isn't going to happen to Sasuke.

He won't allow it.

  
  
  


"Sasuke, you wanted to prove to yourself that you've grown stronger... You can fight her, I know you can. But only until I say stop—she's still too powerful, has way more experience. She's _not_ a Genin."

Sasuke nods. That's right, if he ever wants to stand a chance against Itachi… 

"Watch my back." Sasuke whispers, and activates his Sharingan.

The woman isn't actually trying to kill Sasuke, Izuna's decided. Izuna just has to wait for the right moment... 

_Now!_

Izuna casts a genjutsu, one of his Sharingan's creation. (He's eternally glad for Madara's eyes.) The victim experiences they want to, what they _expect_ to. It's an intricate process that heavily relies on the Sharingan's power of insight and prediction, but renders itself malleable to the victim's desires. An older technique, Izuna believes, in this era. 

The woman falls for it, apparently wanting to _bite_ a cursed seal into Sasuke's upper left shoulder. Izuna's really no good with fuinjutsu, so he has no idea what its purpose would be.

Out of pure spite, he makes the woman think Sasuke gets a kunai to her hair as he goes down in pain, though it's really Izuna. He makes sure to give her an _awful_ cut. He hopes she wears lots of cotton, a fabric prone to drying out hair.

The woman laughs maliciously and sinks into the tree branch, disappearing and leaving poor Sakura and Naruto all confused. Sasuke's legs buckle.

"I think I'm going to pass out." He says just before he goes down.

Sakura and Naruto catch him, looking at Izuna in desperation.

"...I'll find somewhere decent for you all to rest." 

  
  
  


Naruto is currently passed out, his seal acting up from a previous encounter with the snake woman. Sasuke's still out cold. Sakura's trying to fight a team of Sound Genin alongside her fellow Konoha amateurs. She's been calling out to Izuna for help, but he _can't_. He can only solidify for so long everyday, and he can't do it again for about half an hour. She seems to calculate this fairly soon and gains a look of despair.

Yikes.

"Come on, Sakura, you can do it, you're smart! She's only got _one_ hand in your hair! Fight back!" Izuna cheers. 

Sakura, as these gremlin children seem to be prone to doing, decides to _cut her hair upwards with a kunai_. 

"Oh, honey, _no_."

  
  
  


The Sound Genin run away and leave their scroll behind, absolutely terrified of Naruto's Biju chakra spilling out when he wakes up. He hits the ground as soon as they leave his sight, still exhausted from everything that happened yesterday. 

Shikamaru steps up and placates the group, eyeing Naruto with something like resignation. He'd figured him out long before, it seems, though he's careful not to reveal too much to his fellow Konoha Genin. Good choice.

"Come on, Sakura. I'll even your hair out." Ino breaks the tension, and Izuna's sure this would be a nice, possibly bond-repairing act, but. He _cannot_ allow it. She's holding a _kunai_. 

As he's now able to solidify, he places a hand on Ino's arm and ignores her scream.

"Sorry, but I'm going to give Sakura the loveliest bob anyone's ever seen. With _real scissors_."

Tears pool in Sakura's eyes as she launches herself at Izuna, giving him a big hug. 

"You're back, Inner-Sasuke!"

"Alright, alright. I can do a lot with this hair, yes ma'am." Izuna smiles indulgently. He likes her hugs.

The Konoha Genin are all pointing weapons at him, as if they could ever stand a chance.

"...Right. Let me just get Sasuke's scissors and then I'll explain. Word of warning: I'm already dead, so your little pointy things won't do much." 

* * *

Izuna mostly stays dormant until a month later when Konoha has a bad day. He's also having a bad day, now that he can sense Tobirama and Hashirama's chakras. 

You know what? The rest of the world can burn. Izuna's not letting Sasuke go _anywhere_.

  
  
  


"Are we really not talking? Are we seriously doing this?"

Sasuke glowers at him. 

Izuna wilts. 

"I was only trying to protect you..." He mumbles, pouting against his will. Izuna truly feels like Madara's chastised little brother right now. 

"...Why?" Sasuke asks.

Izuna frowns.

"What do you mean, _why_?"

"Why... Why do you care so much? I could've been helping the rest of Konoha!"

"Of course I care. You're– you're my–" Izuna swallows. Madara is gone ~~and Izuna watched him go~~. "You're like a brother to me."

"So what!? What's that even supposed to mean!?"

"It means I love you, you little hellion! I love you and I want you _safe_. I want you to be happy, _but_ _you can't be happy if you're_ ** _dead_** _!_ "

Sasuke stills.

"...Izuna, are you... Are you not happy?" He asks quietly.

That's–! Not what he meant! And _of course_ he is!

"I–" Izuna _is_ happy… right? "I..." Izuna sniffs. Apparently not. Oh, jeeze. He doesn't want to _cry_. "I just– _I really miss Nii-san_."

Well. His no-dwelling policy seems to be malfunctioning. He should get that fixed before he remembers all the things he doesn't want to.

Sasuke blinks, shifting uncomfortably. Yeah, family-talk is probably not his best subject. 

"...Look, I just think you're a little overprotective. But– but maybe I can understand, if you just... explain. You can– You should tell me about your... brother."

Gosh, when did Sasuke get all emotionally intelligent, huh? Madara could never. Sasuke must get that from Izuna, then.

"...Did I ever tell you that I died before Konoha was founded? My brother was Uchiha Madara. And my death ruined him."

Sasuke listens intently, and everything just seems to spill out. 

* * *

Sasuke has heard Itachi was in the village looking for Naruto. Naruto's currently in Shukuba, trying to track down a new Hokage for Konoha with the Sage Jiraiya, since Izuna let the last one die and all.

So obviously Sasuke wants to go to Shukuba. Izuna has mixed feelings about Sasuke's revenge quest, considering it's against his own brother, but that's really the single objection he has. Izuna is already dead, so Sasuke is the _only_ person who's allowed to decide whether Itachi lives or not.

If Madara had done to him what Itachi did to Sasuke... Izuna couldn't kill him. But Sasuke has morals that dictate he _cannot_ let someone like Itachi walk free and inflict himself on others. Izuna actually respects Sasuke's resolve, but he always wonders if Sasuke will come to regret it. He's still unsure why Itachi killed their entire clan—Izuna stayed out of politics after he died.

In the meantime, Izuna is trying to break it to Sasuke that he's going to get _slaughtered_ if he fights Itachi right now.

"...He's stronger than that Orochimaru, I know. I _know_. But I never said I was going to face him alone. I– I always thought... I always thought we were going to do it _together_. That's– that's the whole reason I bargained my hair to you." Sasuke says, swishing his waist-length hair in his hand. 

Oh. 

"But– but he's _your_ brother."

"Yeah, and he killed _our_ clan." Sasuke averts his eyes. "Besides, _you're_ my brother, too." He mumbles.

 _Oh_.

"...Right. Okay, kid. You listen good—we're going to Shukuba. We are going to get your friend to safety, and when we come back to Konoha, I am going to teach you everything I know. We are _not_ going to reveal me to Itachi until you're strong enough to kill him—I want to remain a _surprise_."

Sasuke nods slowly, a little smirk pulling at his lips. He's waited four years. He can wait a bit longer.

Maybe Izuna should feel a bit weirder about helping his brother plan _his_ brother's death, but he doesn't. Oh, well.

  
  
  


Right, _in_ and _out_. 

Itachi's bewildered little squint is something to behold.

* * *

They're confronted by Orochimaru at some point, with four little minions and all. Izuna takes one good look at Orochimaru's perfect hair and decides Sasuke is going to need back up _immediately_. No one who isn't sneaky could regrow all that hair so fast.

Orochimaru smiles at Izuna's appearance.

"I know Sasuke doesn't have my seal. _You're_ the one who engineered that. Just what _are_ you?" Orochimaru marvels. 

Izuna gracefully pushes Sasuke behind him, smiling back confidently.

"Oh, just your friendly Uchiha ghost. I've had Sasuke under my care for quite some time— _you're never going to get him_." His smile sharpens, blasting Orochimaru with killing intent, the kind he's been festering since he could _walk_.

Orochimaru balks and even takes a step back. Sasuke grips Izuna's white garbs more tightly, but otherwise doesn't react. Izuna imagines his particular killing intent is actually quite comforting to Sasuke. 

"No... _who_ are you?" Orochimaru asks, stance steadying. 

"You seem well-studied. I'm Uchiha Izuna. Ring any bells?"

Something dawns on Orochimaru's face. Gosh, Izuna _hopes_ he made the history books. He never paid attention to Sasuke's classwork unless he had a question.

This Orochimaru... is too valuable to just dispose of. Sasuke wouldn't agree, but most of his moral indignation is currently still directed at Itachi. Izuna relaxes himself, nonverbally inviting Orochimaru to do the same.

They're going to have a civil discussion, Izuna's decided.

"I've been dead for generations, an ordinary ghost just haunting about."

Orochimaru's head tilts. Izuna's known Tobirama since he was a young child—he can recognize a curious mind when he sees one.

"Oh? Tell me, how do the dead suddenly begin to interact with the physical realm?" Orochimaru asks greedily.

Izuna leans in, whispers the dark secret of his transition into a poltergeist that he's told no one else...

"Pure _spite_."

Orochimaru laughs, delighted.

_Are you watching, Sasuke? This is how you make a contact out of an enemy._

"Oh, I am _sure_ we can work something out, if I'm not going to obtain young Sasuke..."

* * *

Naruto leaves Sasuke and Sakura behind. Izuna huffs up a storm by the gates when they watch him take off with Jiraiya. Sasuke eyes him, obviously irritated. Whatever. Between Izuna, Kakashi, and Tsunade, Sasuke and Sakura are going to make Naruto _rue_ the day he (temporarily) left them.

So this is how Team 7 technically disbands. Izuna is going to continue to help Sasuke with his revenge for as long as Sasuke wants and as long as he lets Izuna tell him he loves him and lets him play with his hair. He's going to continue to take care of Sakura's new, stylish bob and accept hugs from her. He's going to continue to tire poor Kakashi.

Regarding the more long term... Izuna's no-dwelling policy seems to have permanently malfunctioned—he can no longer repress what took place in the last stages of Madara's life. That dingy cave and that poor Uchiha boy, Obito... Yes, Orochimaru is part of Izuna's plans to put a stop to his brother's machinations. 

If Madara is ever revived... Well, Izuna is sure he can change his mind. He's _excellent_ at winning arguments.

At least the back of Naruto's head is pleasant to look at—Izuna finally got his hands in those spikes. 

Kakashi is next.

**Author's Note:**

> Hey look, it's the time skip! And also the end! :^)


End file.
